Wake up, you stupid girl, now is not the time for dreaming childish dreams and playing childish games. You gave your word and your word is your bond, you soul, your life. You know that, you knew that when you gave it. You can’t hide. You can’t just wake up one morning and decide you don’t want to play anymore. This isn’t a game. This is who you are. This is what you are. And they are part of you. They are part of your kin. They have been about you since before you began to exist. You exist because of them, and they will not be swept aside in your childish and foolish little temper tantrums. Do you not see?! Stupid girl, you almost got yourself wiped out of existence with your uncontrollable rage. But now, you sit, with your silly little bunny, and you see the darkness of your own death before you and what do you leave behind?! A child that has not yet learnt the ways you gave your word to teach her! A child who needs not just your guidance, but your love and acceptance. Wake up silly girl, you can keep your childish ways, for that is what makes you who you are, but you are not an idiot, not a dunce and for the love of your Gods, do not act like one. You know what you must do, so wake up, stupid girl, and make amends for the offence you have caused!
The piercing blue eyes seemed to burn through her soul. The long black hair flowed with life of its own. The porcelain white skin shone in the moonlight. The raven that sat in the dead tree behind her did not move. The ruins lay around them like dark shadows in the moonlight, each stone unique but all seemed less mystical and more intimidating with each and every word the beautiful but terrifying woman spat at her. At times the woman’s eyes glowed, so great seemed her rage.
And all she could do was kneel on the grass before the Goddess, for surely that is what she was, and know the truth of her very words. Know that she had strayed so far from not just her own path, but all paths, know that she was lost in her own ego. The thought was shocking. She always thought that she had no ego, but secretly, it had grown and now she had thought to set herself up, above the Goddesses and Gods she once sought to worship, that she had given homage to. Without knowing it, she had lost herself to her own power mongering, her own desire to be great, without realising that she was already great. And in doing so, she had lost some of that greatness, if not all of it. She had lost her position, so to speak.
The woman, her beautiful red robe flowing around her, seemed to be waiting and it dawned on her to respond. And so she responded, speaking words that bubbled from her heart, begging forgiveness while acknowledging her mistakes, and the lessons she had learnt. The words struggle to match what her heart wants to say.
Her head touches the ground before the feet of the one she calls My ‘Lady. The tears that fall are still the tears of a child, but also the tears of a mother and the tears of an old lady. They all mix together, a pool of innocent, nurturing and tired tears. They sparkle in the moonlight, their colours conflicting. So many emotions mixed into a small body. Her words just didn’t seem to cut it. What words could she find? She had messed up. She had made oaths to the Old Gods, than she had … well broken them, if she was to be honest. She, without meaning to, had set her own image up in their place. And they had replied and the cost was great. Ancient curse for betraying an ancient magic. She desperately wanted to fix this, but did not know where to begin.
The Goddess took a step back, while still looking angry, her beautiful face had softened just a little. She felt the tiniest slither of hope in her heart.
The place to begin, is at the beginning. Go back and start again. Forget all you think you know and relearn all that you have forgotten. That is your first step to amend, but you will face many tests long the way, to show your path is true, for this is the path you chose and it is the path bound with your destiny, and that of your kin to follow
And then she was gone and the moon had sunk behind the ruined wall and darkness came around her as she turned and walked from the garden of lost summers. Back to the beginning she would go, relearn all that she had forgotten she would do, and this time, this time she would get it right, she swore it to herself, and to the little bunny in her pocket.